


An Old Familiar Doorway, Part One

by sadbenny



Series: An Old Familiar Doorway [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Domestic, Angst, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Short, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-07
Updated: 2015-11-07
Packaged: 2018-04-30 12:20:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5163626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sadbenny/pseuds/sadbenny
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Years have passed since Benny last saw Dean, and Benny is filled with regret.  A changed man, he returns to face his past, only to discover he is not the only one who has changed.</p>
            </blockquote>





	An Old Familiar Doorway, Part One

He stood facing the door to the brownstone, unable to move further. The entry appeared unchanged, despite the passage of time.  The stoop was concrete, forever in need of repair.  Uneven stones curved to an arch, leading to the old door of heavy, dark wood.

Benny took a breath.

It was the familiarity that had stopped him. He was an old man standing on a stoop, gazing back through time to a past he never dreamt he would confront. The door before him as warm and inviting now as it had when he first entered.

Eager fingers undoing buttons.  

The taste of his mouth as they stumbled through the doorway.

The heat of his touch.

Vivid now as a waking dream.  
**  
**It was only supposed to be once, but he saw him again. The plan was to keep it casual. No mornings. No feelings. No gifts. **  
**

There were mornings. There were feelings. Then, a gift.

A gift of a key. _That damn key_.

Soon after, coldness.  Fights.  Hard words and slammed doors.  

Dean regretted giving him the key.  Dean regretted letting him in at all.  Benny tried to mend it.  He tried to get closer again.

The more he fought and struggled to fix it, the more they both were suffocated in the smoke and ash.  The fire had gone out.  It was time to run.

And so, he left.

Time passed.

_He_ changed.

The _world_ changed. 

But the doorway remained the same.

And he still had the damn key. 

He allowed himself to believe it was the key that had done it. If the fire was dwindling before that, he didn't want to know.

He reached into his pocket for the key, then thought better of it. Even if the key still worked, it would be ludicrous to walk in like he'd only been gone a day. There was bound to be some anger. Questions. Tears. It was better to press the buzzer.

He searched for the name on the directory, and stopped once more.

Winchester/Novak 

Winchester/Novak

Winchester...

Panic. 

He retreated. 

His brain swimming, he walked fast and directionless. Unforgiving concrete underneath his feet. He was a fool. A fucking, stupid fool. 

Dean was with someone. 

Dean was _living_ with someone.

What, did he think Dean had been waiting in the apartment this whole time, anxiously anticipating his return? Dean probably rebounded directly into the arms of this _Novak_. At this point, Dean and Novak would have been **together** many **times** over their **time together**.  

Names side-by-side.  A partner.  An equal.

Dean didn’t push Novak away. 

Novak wasn’t a blip in Dean’s timeline. A moment, gone and forgotten.  

Why him?

"Benny?"

The voice tore him back to reality.

Dean looked much the same. Older. More square in the jaw. Crows feet. But more or less unchanged.  Heck, he was sure he'd seen him wear that exact outfit on multiple occasions.  He still ached for him.

Dean was hand in hand with a stranger. A man with pale blue eyes in a trench coat. The man looked from Benny to Dean, brow knitted, curious. Love was there. Kindness. Respect. Open and comfortable. Hands held in the street for all to see.

They were walking home. 

"Wow, uh. Benny. It's been a long time."

“Yes.  It has.”  



End file.
